This is part two, (part one can be found here) in a series on “Roles” inspired by this interview with a friend and mentor.

What “Roles” do you hold? Or what “Hats” do you wear?

Can we agree that for every role, “mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, co-worker, volunteer etc.) there are a set of spoke and unspoken expectations that you and those around you have for that role?

I think sometimes we don’t really take the time to think about that simple, but true fact.  We are so busy “doing” that we forget (often) to think about what we are doing and  why we are doing it!

So the first question in a Role Audit is:

❡ Who am I? (In other words, what “hats” am I wearing?)

After you have identified what the roles are in your life ask yourself:

❡ What are the responsibilities that accompany each role?

Responsibilities is really a question of what must be done to satisfy the requirements of that role.


Some roles in your life might be quite subjective in nature.  Meaning, it’s up to you and those around you to evaluate and decide when it comes to thinking about what the responsibilities are for a given role.  Some might disagree with me, but I think the role of parent, being a friend, a community member etc, can be quite subjective in nature.  What I may see as my responsibility as a parents, other parents may not see as necessary at all.  This is not about value judgements.  It’s about being clear, for yourself what you are trying to accomplish with each hat you wear.  In reality this step, just like creating a vision, helps clarify decision making.  When you know what you are responsible for, you start to know what is important to say “yes” to, and maybe, even more importantly, you know what to say “no” to!

Other roles in your life probably have objective: set responsibilities. Professional roles have set outcomes that you are responsible to achieve.    As you think about these roles in your life, outlining the responsibilities will be much easier.  Take a look at your job description and see what you are being require and evaluated on.  Even the “defined” roles in our life, do, I believe have unspoken responsibilities that we may be measured against.  Take time to think through the defined and expected, but undefined responsibilities in this category too.

❡Are you surprised by the number “hats” that you wear?

❡Do you need to make any changes? (IE: can you combine any roles, do you need to let go of any roles? Is there a role that you are missing that your unique strengths and gifts are begging to have an opportunity to “shine” at?)

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